My Darling Deer, Let's get Married!
by Ms. Kinnikufan
Summary: A prequal to "My Darling Deer" Gazelleman and Checkmate Get married. Light and fluffy yaoi for Valentine's Day.


My Darling Deer, Let's get Married!

By Ms. Kinnikufan

Disclaimer: All characters are copyrighted their owners.

Note: This fic fits into what I call the "My Darling Deer" universe. It takes place 12 years before that fic.

A few months previously:

Checkmate and Gazelleman were supposed to be at a romantic Italian restaurant. 

But unfortunately, there had been an accident. No had been hurt in the accident itself, but when a busload full of P.E.T.A. (People for Ethical Treatment of Animal) crushes into a busload of P.E.T.A. members (People for Eating Tasty Animals) you can bet there is going to be a fight, followed by a riot. Thus there was a traffic jam.

Thus Gazelleman and Checkmate had been stuck in a traffic jam for quite a while.

Gazelleman groaned internally. This was not the romantic proposal situation he had pictured. He had a great romantic evening planned: flowers, a special table, a violinist, champagne and all the romantic stuff that is supposed to go with a marriage proposal.

But instead he had to be stuck in a traffic jam; the world's most unromantic proposal scenario.

Gazelleman struck his head against the steering wheel in frustration. That released the airbag.

"DAMN DAMN DAMN IT ALL!" Checkmate helped Gazelleman pull away from possible suffocation.

"This evening sucks. Nothing is going right. I had this whole romantic evening planned out. I was going to make this the most romantic proposal ever-"

"What? What was thou art planning to do?"

"Oh Damn! It was supposed to be a surprise!" Gazelleman managed to avoid setting off the airbag just in time.

"Because this evening is off, doth that mean the proposal is off too?"

"No, no, of course not!"

"So thee and me are to get married?'

"Yesyes we are. Damn it, that wasn't romantic at all!"

"It's all rightfiancée." The word made Checkmate feel bubbly all over.

And so Gazelleman and Checkmate got engaged during a traffic jam.

A few months later:

It was a lovely day for a wedding. The sky was a pleasant blue, the sun was shining and it was warm. One would almost expect garland-toting bluebirds to appear. Just like in fairy tales.

However the couple to be married was very un-fairy taleish. Kings often marry, but simply not to gazelle-men.

Speaking of said Gazelleman:

"I can't believe I thought it would be a good idea for Mantaro to marry us!"

"Well bro, I bet you didn't expect Mantaro to have a bachelor party in your honor, " Foxglove (Gazelleman's visiting sister) remarked.

"No I didn't, Damn it he better not be so hungover that he slurs his lines!"

"Big brother, who cares if he slurs the lines, this a celebration of yours and Checkmate's love for each otherespecially since Japan not gonna let get any tax breaks."

'Suzette, youngest sister of mine, you're not helping. Are my antler shiny enough?"

Meanwhile in Checkmate's room:

"You know Checkmateyou don't have to wear a veil if you don't want to." Sunshine thought Checkmate looked incredibly unmasculine with a veil.

"But I wished to, Master Sunshinedoth not my bouquet look lovely" Checkmate showed off his bouquet, a lovely mix of roses, peonies, and lilies.

I knew I should have explained to him the difference between boys and girl at the age of 10 and not the age of 15, Sunshine silently regretted to himself.

Meanwhile, everybody else:

Terry and Sieuchin were acting as ushers, while Mantaro was readying himself to perform the ceremony.

Terry's thought were full of Checkmate, the one he secretly like but was too afraid to act on that like. Terry sighed. It was his fault only and his fault alone. Gazelleman didn't know that Terry liked Checkmate too, nor did Checkmate know that Terry liked him. Terry refused to begrudge Gazelleman and Checkmate their future happiness. But still if only-

"Are you going to seat us or not?" Terry's thoughts were interrupted.

"Rinko, Jacqueline? You can sit over there." Terry pointed to some seats in the far back.

"Why so far in the back?"

"Trust meeverything will go much more smoothly if you two sit in the back."

Terry knew that if Rinko and Jacqueline (also know as the "three dolla holla" of the I.W.F.) were within Mantaro's sight, chaos would erupt.

Sieuchin thoughts were of his own wedding, which took place a few years ago.

He met college student in a supermarket. They bumped into each other, and dropped their groceries. They exchanged awkward apologies and pleasantries. When they got home, they discovered that they had scooped up each other's groceries.

The student didn't have the time to cook a giant raw fish and Sieuchin didn't feel right eating someone's else groceries. They met once again at a take-out place. They exchanged pleasantries once more. Her name was Kasumi Tendou. A little over a year later, her name became Kasumi Tusket. Theirs was a crazy wedding, for her family seemed to attract chaos. Sieuchin hoped Checkmate and Gazelleman's wedding would go smoothly. He knew Gazelleman could be a bit obsessed with perfection.

Mantaro smoothed out the wrinkles out of the pale azure and gold royal Kinniku robes. He signed internally. Would he always be alone? The two girls he had wanted now wanted each other instead. Rinko and Jacqueline, two girls he had never imagined falling for each other under an unbreakable Kinniku- wizard's love spell. A surprising lot of couples had come together that way, Ikeman and El Nino, Samuu and Keiko, The Addams and Tamaki, Rabbi Sarah Epstein and Blocken Jr, and finally Scarface and Robin Mask (the last couple required Kevin Mask to once again to check into therapy.)

So many others had already married. The aforementioned couples, plus Sieuchin and his wife. Would he be the last or even worst never find someone at all? The Kinniku kingdom was putting pressure on him to find someone and reproduce. But time was running out, he was getting older and ugliertime was running out.

"Three O'clock! I gotta get to the podium!" Mantaro realized he was going to be late.

Sunshine walked Checkmate down the aisle, deeply, deeply; wishing Checkmate wasn't wearing a veil.

I'm really getting married. I can't believe this is really happening to me. All those people are staring meI'm surprised Kevin and Croe cameCroe probably made him come.

Gazelleman stood waiting at the podium. Checkmate looks so lovely with that veil on. Oh man, I'm really doing this. I hope I don't screw up. I hope my marriage doesn't turn out like my parentsthey tomcatted around the worlddropping off the occasional baby in Tanzania with it's aunt and uncleIf we have a family, I don't want to be like that.

Checkmate joined Gazelleman at the podium. No sign of Mantaro. 

"Where is th-" "I'm Here! I'm here!" Mantaro shouted.

Mantaro took a moment to smooth out the new wrinkles in his robe.

"Friends, familyother people who have come to this wedding, We are gather here to join these two men in a union of love. Love it's a good thing. Love it's errr"

Good God, he's making it up as he goes along. Gazelleman was horrified

"eeeerrrI bet Gazelleman never expected to find love in Checkmate when Checkmate twisted arm. Yes, love is a good thing. It make people happyit's what makes most babiesit brings joy to people and stuff"

"You think they could have a found a better justice of the peace." Kevin whispered to Croe. Several people shushed him.

"Gazelleman and Checkmatethey have been through a whole lot of crapfrom the discovery that Checkmate was one of quintuplets and the angst that followedit broke them apart (Gazelleman kicked Mantaro for mentioning that), but what's important it that they came back together. And now they wish to partake of the union of marriage, a mainly permanent unionAnd now Checkmate and Gazelleman would like to say some vows of their own."

"Darling Zelle, I'm glad we met that match. I admit we did get off on the right foot. But I'm glad that I started feeling pain again at that matchIt meant I feel good things too. Good thing such as the love I feel for thee right now and always. Our love is a good one. I love theeI don't know how to put it any other wayI love thee. Every single piece of trouble we have been through was worth it, worth this. I am happy to spend the rest of my natural life with thee."

Sunshine made some sounds that sounded like crying.

"CheckmateWhen I first saw you, I didn't believe someone so radiant could be a Devil Chojin. I couldn't resist a chance to have skin to skin contact with you. You ended up twisting both my arm and my heart that day. But when you appeared again at Mantaro's match with Hanzo, I was glad to see you again. I'm glad that we got to have more moment again. I am so happy that you started feeling things again, so that we could have in love and be here today. I want you more then anyone in my life. I need you more then anything in my life. I love you more then anything in my life, Checkmate."

"Hey that's a rip off of Daft Punk!" Kevin muttered. "Shut up Mask!" A voice in the back said.

"Okay, you two repeat "we shall" after me"" Mantaro began.

"Chester Albert Brennington and Zelle Francis Andrea Van Dik (There were some giggles, "Francis Andrea?" "Their real names aren't Checkmate and Gazelleman?" "You're stupid Jacqueline!") Promise to respect each other?"

"We shall"

"Commit to each other?"

"We shall"

"Work through all your problems together?"

"We shall"

"Provide a loving and stable home for any children you might have?"

"We shall"

"Remain faithful to each other as long as both of you live?"

"We shall"

"Also, you two aren't just getting married because one of you is pregnant?"

They stared blankly at Mantaro.

"I'm obligated to ask every couple that question. Anyway, finally, but most importantly, do you promise to love each other?"

"We shall."

"If anyone has any reason why this man and this man should not be join in union, speak now or for-"

"Don't marry him! He's a sleaze! A total sleaze! He exploits girls for porn!" a young man came running down the aisle. "Don't marry him Sae!"

"Ummm.there's kind of no one name Sae here! In fact if you take a close look, neither of us is a woman, you idiot! You've got the wrong wedding" a flustered Gazelleman shouted.

"Oh shit! I am!" The young man then ran back up the aisle.

"OkaaaayyyIf anyone has any reason why this and this man shouldn't be join in union speak now or forever hold your peace."

"2,4,6,8. QUEER CHOJIN SHOULD NOT ASSIMULATE!" a crowd of people in the back shouted.

"Oh screw you guys, (Mantaro dismissed The Union of Gay/Bi/Transgender Chojin with a wave of his hand. Security then came and dragged away the protesters) I pronounce you two, spouse and spouse. You may kiss each other!"

They did. Everyone cheered some because it now meant they could get out of their uncomfortable seats.

Gazelleman and Checkmate walked down the aisle amid the cheering throng.

At the end of the aisle, Checkmate threw the bouquet.

"OWWWW! OWWWWW! The thorns are in my face!" Mantaro screamed as the bouquet hit him in the face. Further pain awaited him as a bunch of guests tackled him for the bouquet.

Then the partying started.

'Man Kevin yous got fat! OhI know nows, yous are knocked up again!" Scarface exclaimed, poking Kevin in his rounded stomach.

"What do you mean again! It's only my second!" Shouted Kevin, kicking Scarface in the balls.

"Kevin, you will not hit your stepfather like that!" Robin pulled his son away from Scarface.

"He's no stepfather of mine, you bastard!" Kevin screamed.

"Croe it looks like you're needed." Croe once again found himself stopping a possible riot between Kevin, Scarface and Robin.

"Congratulations you two," Sieuchin mother enveloped Checkmate and Gazelleman in a rib crushing hug.

"Thanks" Checkmate and Gazelleman had trouble breathing.

A horrified scream was heard.

"What do you mean I'm going to get a little brother or sister? You knocked up Scarface?" Kevin could be heard miles away.

"I thought you'd be happy son. You always wanted a little brother or sister!" Robin shouted.

"Well, It looks like its back to family therapy back to them." Checkmate remarked.

"So when are you too having kids?" Sunshine asked.

He received a blank stare.

Meanwhile Mantaro focused on getting drunker, and drunker. It made it easier to deal with the fact that Jacqueline and Rinko were together.

"God, I wish those two weren't together!" Mantaro cried into the punchbowl.

"You know, we actually wish the same. Rinko deserves better then that three dolla holla!" Keiko and Tamaki remarked.

"Mazel Tov" Blocken Jr and his wife, Rabbi Sarah Epstein wished Gazelleman and Checkmate good luck. 

"What an odd couple" Gazelleman remarked.

"Aren't we allhusband?" Checkmate pinched Gazelleman tight antelope butt.

"Hey you two! Get a room!" shouted a passer-byer.

"Trust uswe will" Gazellema smiled lecherously.

The rest of the reception was very eventful indeed. More arguments occurred between the father and son Mask. Rex King came on to Crione Man, which resulted in him getting punched in the face by Jade. Mantaro tried to marry Ramenman to a tree then tried to marry Apollo to an ice swan. Needless, to say he was unsuccessful in both attempts.

Checkmate and Gazelleman tried to quietly exit towards their limo, which would take them to the airport for their honeymoon.

"You guys aren't getting away that easily!" Terry shouted

They were assaulted with a great amount of rice, birdseed and popcorn.

"Owwwwthis rice is hotand has a piece of beef in it!" Checkmate pulled a piece of meat off his cheek!"

"WHEEEEEE!" The now completely drunk Mantaro was randomly throwing handfuls of beef guidon.

Despite the mess, the two managed to get to their limo, which had the standard wedding vandalism, including tin cans tied to the muffler.

12 years and 3 children later...

"And that was our wedding" finished Gazelleman.

"How did Robin Mask get Scarface pregnant? And how did Kevin Mask get pregnant?" asked Queenie.

" Errrwe don't know honey." Checkmate lied.

"FathersKudu's hanging on the ceiling fan again." Informed Impala.

"WHEEEE!" screeched Kudu, hanging from the ceiling fan.

" Kudu get down from there right now!" Checkmate and Gazelleman shouted in unison.

And so ended another day in the happy Gazelleman/Checkmate family.


End file.
